Why do the Filmfare awards still exist? Oscars they aren’t. As stuffy as the academy is, it still manages to get things right half the time while still having some dry humor here and there…the Filmfare awards are the exact opposite. They manage to bestow accolades upon, pretty much, everything un-deserving, all the while showing no signs humor, wit or imagination.
I’ve always likened them to the Grammy’s…all the bombast and no substance. The most money making movies get the awards, the deserving ones get nothing because they had no item numbers, no explosions, and no big backing of ivory hands.
…and god lord can the celebrities who attend these look any more miserable! If your bread and butter is pretending to be someone else then pretend to be a person who is actually happy to be there. One look at their stoic, docile faces and it makes you want to give yourself an award for putting up with this. I can only guess that their sourpuss mugs are because of 2 things:
1) The incredibly irritating hosts. Filmfare always manages to find the most flamboyant, gaudy, shatter mouth of a douchebag as a host. Be it one of those actors who never made it but leeched around long enough to be a memorable face (be it a good memory or bad is entirely debatable) or some comedian who does everything but make you laugh.
2) Set Designs. I’ve yet to see one Indian award show where the set design didn’t look like it was designed by a gay, junior high school drama teacher. Do they use these sets for elementary school plays after this is done? Oscars, as boring as they can be, at least treat their guests like royalty. FilmFare awards, as far as I can remember, have the Bollywood elite sitting on metal folding chairs in what seems like an open field. Seriously? Is it an award show or a graduation?
Make me feel like these awards matter by at least putting in an effort in the presentation. A shiny turn is still a turd, but at least it’s shiny. If I am going to look at a piece of turd at least it can glimmer.
Add in horrible editing, horrible cameras (Home movie camcorders can achieve better quality than the cameras use to shoot these awards), incredibly awkward speeches (for the love of Zeus, speak Hindi if your English sucks), incredibly awkward exits (no one has bean of a clue as to where to exit from), and 400+ dance numbers by the actors themselves (yes, your lip-synching skills are really mystifying me) and these award shows really start to put a boil on my ass.
Only thing to look forward to is the expected Johnny Lever stand up, which is usually a hit rather than a miss.
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